| I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, | | | | When bleakness comes, it seems to steal one's breath |
| acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all | | | | away. The result is oxygen deprivation. If you wanted |
| I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand | | | | to make yourself feel lousy, all you'd need to do is |
| thing. -- Agatha Christie | | | | spend a few minutes taking shallow breaths. |
| A bleak, foreboding day comes eventually for each of | | | | You need to re-oxygenate the body to clear your |
| us. | | | | mind. Why not do this at the outset? Because your |
| Bleakness binds the mind, makes the chest feel heavy, | | | | mind needed to be distracted from its perceptions |
| forces the head down as though a great weight had | | | | about what was happening. It's a lot easier to focus on |
| dropped upon it overnight. Thoughts such as, "What's | | | | breathing once you've throttled back the freight train of |
| the point?" and "What am I going to do now?" come | | | | despair. |
| unbidden. In bleak times it may seem as though your | | | | Begin by sighing. Sighing comes naturally and has the |
| well has run dry, that there is no recourse, no salvation. | | | | beneficial effect of relaxing the diaphragm and |
| Yet there is always a path of action, even when you | | | | stomach muscles. Sigh three times. Then take a deep |
| find yourself facing what seem to be limited options. | | | | breath and release it slowly. Take 14 more deep |
| The challenge when life looks bleak is to reclaim the | | | | breaths, then scan your body again. |
| energy trapped in the bleakness trance. | | | | What do you notice now? |
| Acknowledge | | | | Step Out and Re-engage the Larger World |
| Begin by acknowledging your state of mind without | | | | Step out of the present situation now. A change of |
| trying to change it. There's a natural tendency to | | | | environment works wonders. It isn't that you're trying to |
| struggle when one feels trapped. Acknowledge the | | | | change the situation. You can't. But you're shifting your |
| struggle itself. Acknowledge the condition of bleakness | | | | perspective about it, and that's powerful. |
| rather than the story of bleakness. | | | | Walk outside or visit a quiet place such as a church, |
| Here's the difference: The story of bleakness is the | | | | library, park, or garden. You don't have to speak to |
| tale of woe, the list of fears and worst-case scenarios | | | | others; simply notice the world around you. Notice that |
| the mind manufactures. You'll enumerate those in a | | | | it is always moving forward, no matter what happens. |
| minute, but what's important is raising your awareness | | | | Reflect on the difficulties you've faced before and |
| about the state you're in. | | | | notice you moved forward too. |
| At the top of a sheet of paper, write, "My mind is telling | | | | Remain engaged for at least 90 minutes before |
| me [insert the condition here]." Some examples: | | | | returning to the situation you're facing. |
| - My mind is telling me I'll never recover from this | | | | Recognize the Simple Truth |
| broken relationship. | | | | Return to the situation now with a new perspective. |
| - My mind is telling me we'll never have money again | | | | The simple truth is that you have survived many trials |
| and I don't know what to do. | | | | and griefs in your life, and the one you face now is no |
| - My mind is telling me I'll never find another job. | | | | different. |
| - My mind is telling me that I'll never get over my grief. | | | | The reality is that you're here, now, confronting what's |
| Writing down your state of mind puts it out in the open | | | | disturbed you. You have the opportunity to select the |
| where it can air out, so to speak. As soon as you take | | | | attitude that will best serve you and those around you |
| this step, you already have reclaimed some of the | | | | as you move through whatever is happening in your |
| energy trapped by bleakness. | | | | life today. |
| Now you have options. | | | | It may not be easy, but it isn't hard, either. |
| List the Fears | | | | Identify New Options |
| Get specific. List all the fears your mind creates about | | | | Read through your list of fears. The list represents |
| the situation you're in. Write quickly. List all the | | | | what your mind made up as the worst things that |
| worst-case options, and for each answer the following | | | | could happen. Perhaps now you can perceive the |
| questions: What's the worst thing that will happen? | | | | fears on that list from a new point of view. The worst- |
| What's the worst of that? | | | | case scenario could happen, but you get to create the |
| Write until you can write no more. Then set the list | | | | options for handling it.when you operate from an |
| aside and find a comfortable place to sit. | | | | attitude of conscious choice, you take responsibility for |
| Tune Into the Body | | | | your attitude from a positive position. You reclaim the |
| Scan your body slowly from head to toe, going first | | | | energy that was bound up by fear and can move with |
| down the front and returning up the back. Be aware of | | | | faith that you will be able to respond appropriately to |
| temperature, tension, and how you're holding yourself. | | | | whatever happens. |
| Thoughts will rise. Watch them but don't play along. | | | | In so doing, you may discover there is no bleakness, |
| Bring your attention back to the full body scan. | | | | ever. |
| Proceed to the next step after three slow, complete | | | | There is only presence and the positive flow of life |
| scans. | | | | itself. |
| Oxygenate | | | | |